It has been said that we are raising one of the meanest, coldest and most selfish generations in history. One winter morning I was visiting a local school to conduct a training session, and as I was walking in an elderly woman fell in front of me and a doorway filled with students. My first reaction was to try to catch her but I was too slow. As I lifted her up and helped her gather her things, all you could hear was laughter coming from the youth in the doorway. Not one person lifted a finger to assist her or me. Not one youth asked, “Are you okay, Miss?”

My fear is with the pains of real life and lifelike dramas like “CSI,” movies like “Saw,” video games such as “Fight Night” and all the songs that glorify pain and punishment our youth are becoming numb to human suffering. Numb to loving thy brother!

Now when it comes to fleshly, sensuous and sexual love (Eros) our sons have that mastered. As I am writing this page I received a news report that read:

“After an outbreak of pregnancies among middle school girls, education officials in this city have decided to allow one school’s health center to make birth control pills available to girls as young as 11.”

These young ladies did not get pregnant by themselves, they had help, and the help came from our sons. Our sons need to know about what real love is and why it is worth waiting for, no matter what they see, hear and think.

When you add to that the perverse definitions of love that our sons see with the abuse of women, understandably our sons are confused. Sometimes their own mothers are abused for what is called love. Our sons need to know the truth about love from us before they leave and enter the world.

We must train our sons to love, and the best way is to provide healthy examples and experiences that show them that someone loves them. We must train them that love is not only feelings but real love involves sacrifice and is not self-serving. It is being concerned about the well-being of others.

The other aspect of training our sons to love is preparing them for choosing a mate for life. If our sons are left to figure this one out for themselves, it would be similar to leaving them in the kitchen with a gas stove and matches and saying, “Light the fire. I will be back!”

Power Paren-T-een Tip of the Week:

If we leave matchmaking to our sons they will undoubtedly follow the popular method. The popular formula for choosing a mate is simple: it is 90 percent external (how she looks) and 10 percent self (what she can do for me). If our sons are left to themselves without proper training in this area, their flesh and the Jezebels will always win over the virtuous women of the world that are described in Proverbs 31:10-30.

Carlos Johnson is the founder of the I.M.A.G.E. Personal Success Training Institute and the family director at Evangel Ministries. He conducts Power Paren-T-een seminars for parents and “Helping YOU-th Succeed” workshops for youth. He may be contacted at www.imageofsuccess.com or by calling 1-(888) IMAGE-24.